Life Lesson #4 - Things to Keep in Mind when Renting Your First Time

Finding the right place to live after college can be straight-up stressful. There are so many things to consider when looking for somewhere to live, and I'm going to add right to that list that you already have. Now these are inconveniencies? I was stuck with it after signing the rent agreement, and that's just how it goes sometimes - you won't know until they happen or you come across them. So grab a pen and paper, or open the notes app on your phone, because you're going to want to think about these things before you lay awake at 3 am because the ceiling light turned on all by itself and the radiator band is in the middle of its third concert of the night. I had a love-hate relationship with my first post-grad house rental, but it would have been nice if it was all love.

1. Do NOT live in the same building as your landlord

Starting off SO strong, with lucky No.1. For the love of god, do not live in the same house as your landlord. You might be thinking Why would I even consider that in the first place? and to that, you already have more brains than I do.

Let me tell you a little story or maybe even several stories about Little Blue. I'm not sure when the first time was when I lay in bed just about to fall asleep when my landlord and his wife exchanged the beloved and kind words "Fuck you", "Shut the fuck up", "You bitch", "You fucking alcoholic", and how could I forget "Maybe if you weren't such an fucking alcoholic your daughter would actually talk to you" to each other. It was absolute music to my ears, a lullaby some might say, as they continued to exchange words of utter love at the top of their voices as doors were slamming, voices were raised, dogs were barking, and then the point came where one of them had no more "love" to give and left in their car for the rest of the night. God, did I live for the silence after the storm of each fight of theirs. Don't ever pick the room below your landlord's bedroom, either. Such a bad idea, but it's not like I got a blueprint of the place. I could tell the two of them really loved each other because they said these things to each other about once a week. I felt horrible for their 14 year old daughter. To have to listen to your parents say those things about each other is just cruel. I thought about telling them to go get serious help with our last month's rent so many times.

You'd think my roommate and I wouldn't have had to worry about noise levels in our unit, considering the amount of shouting that went on upstairs, but they were freakishly hyperaware of our sound levels. How could I forget the night we were building my roommate's new dresser after work on a Friday night, you know, because we just moved in and needed furniture, when our landlord thought to text us and ask when we were going to be done with the loud banging. And to that, I would like to add that his daughter plays soccer, and for some reason, it was just fine for her to play soccer in my roommate's room. How does one go about telling your landlord that they are being too noisy in their own home??? Don't even get me started with how the basement of their "home" of 14 years looked. I told my parents when I moved in that if I ever went missing, the basement of that house needed to be the first place they looked. Dirt floors, mountains of random shit? and we had to pay for washing and drying. Do not live anywhere you have to use quarters to clean your clothes and opt for an in-unit washer and dryer to make your life a million times easier. My roommate and I didn't step foot down their more than three times for an entire year.

Do yourself a huge favor and live with other tenents or by yourself. You can thank me later.

2. Location, Location, Location

This one is pretty obvious, but some things to keep in mind are how far the grocery store, gym, postal office, work, entertainment, etc., is.

3. Top or Bottom?

Get your head out of your a**. I'm talking about living on the top floor or the bottom floor. Anyway, the answer is top. Listen closely. If the house you are looking at has wood flooring, you 1000% choose the top floor, and if the top floor is not an option, you need to run away from that house. Going back to Little Blue, the entire house had wood flooring, and I could hear each and every footstep that was made. The sound of the dog claws was atrocious, especially at 3 am.

4. Who else is living in your space with you?

It's always going to come down to my old landlord...so when we were touring Little Blue, we obviously knew that the husband was a landlord and he was showing his own home, lol. We were also told that his wife was a nurse - But wait! Didn't he yell at her for being an alcoholic? Yes. And she's a nurse? Yes. We didn't see her much, but we did see the beverage cans every week in the recycling, and her occasional appearance with black sunnies. But anyway. Being that my room was below the parents' room, and I would get woken up several times during the night due to the dogs and creaky ass wood flooring, I knew when the wife left at 3 am for her shift. Of course, I had no idea that paying attention to when other tenants leave for work would be important when looking to rent, and that's why I'm telling you now. Every Sunday and Tuesday morning, I'd wake up at 3 am and get ready with Ms. Nurse from my bed. Ask if tenants ever work from home. This could determine whether or not you can work from home or if you need to find another location.

5. Sunlight

Sunshine is my Sertraline, and if it's yours too, you need to pay attention to the amount of sunlight you get in your apartment. SEEK south, west, and southwest-facing windows. You will get the sunrise with east windows and the sunset with west windows. Keep this in mind when buying plants, also.

6. Heating/Cooling/Utilities

You will spend a lot of money on utilities if there is no centralized AC. Window units use a significant amount of energy and are really only effective if you seal the windows extremely well. Having radiators for heat is like having AC/DC, an opera singer, and a triangle player all in one. Avoid at all costs - yes, they're cute, but they'll wake you up in the middle of the night, too. Check that they work properly and ask that they get checked professionally before winter comes. Make sure to check the water pressure of your sinks and showers (This is seriously make or break for me). Wouldn't be a bad idea to check water drainage either. Are there enough outlets in the right places? How much do utilities cost, and are they included in the rent price, or are they additional? How is wifi set up? Do you have to use quarters for the washer and dryer? Because I did, and it was ridiculous and should be included in rent in Minneapolis. We aren't in New York, honey.

7. Landlord Expectations

Be sure to ask about any expectations of the property before you sign any sort of agreement. Who is responsible if appliances break/die or if a lightbulb needs to be replaced? What is the timeline for any communication between the tenant and landlord? How is rent supposed to be paid: Venmo, check, or cash? Little Blue required that we pay by check, which I had, but my roommate did not.

8. Parking

Is there enough parking for you to find a spot easily after work? Street parking, garage parking, or additional parking fees in a garage? Think about parking when the weather may be a problem - consider snow emergencies, street cleaning. etc.

These are just a few, and I'm sure there will be plenty more things to add through the years.